As many of you already know, Bob left for his trip on Oct. 3, 2010 at 2:04 AM. It was a wonderful send off that we will remember for ever. Bob was surrounded by love of friends and family.
At 1:30 I got the uncontrollable urge to make chocolate chip cookies. I had no idea why I had this urge, I just did. I announced to everyone that I had to make cookies and Pat came with me to help. I found a mix of peanut butter cookies and Pat said that would be perfect with chocolate chips, since Bob’s favorite candy is peanut butter cups.
Pat and I made cookies and the smell of fresh cookies filled the house. It was a warm, happy smell. Tina went in to check on her father and came out and told me that the cookies were almost done. I went in the house, took the cookies out of the oven, placed them on a plate, and put the last batch in the oven. I walked down to Bob.
“Pop, I made you cookies, and I sure hope you can smell them,” I said. I rubbed his head and held his hand. He laid there and took his last breath with me. I couldn’t believe that he waited for me, and the smell of cookies.
We then all gathered around his bed, and shed a small tear knowing there would be no new memories made with Bob on this earth. We all hugged and then it was like a heavy vale was lifted.
So life moves on with a blessed past. There will be a gathering of friends and family at the house the first weekend of November. Bob loved cookouts and fishing and we are going to remember him the way he wanted to be remembered. We will be sitting in the back yard, telling stories, fishing, and eating hamburgers, his favorite meal. We will end the evening with fireworks so he and Joan will be able to look down and smile along with us with pride and joy.
We will latter, during the summer take his ashes to Hazard, Kentucky and lay him to rest beside Joan. We will let everyone know when this date will be when we are aware of dates and times.
His obituary was placed in the Lexington, Harold and read as followed:
CHIPLEY Robert "Bob", 80, passed away quietly on Sun, Oct 3, 2010. After serving his country in the USMC, Bob was a lifelong firefighter starting his career in Lexington in 1952. He moved to Orlando in 1971 and was the first fire chief at Walt Disney World. His vast experience included working as the Florida State Fire Marshal, Director of Florida firefighters training facility in Ocala and finally, Chief of the Port Orange Fire Dept. Bob was a dedicated and loving family man. He leaves a wonderful legacy including three children, Robin, Rob, and Tina; eight grandchildren and five great-grandchildren. He also leaves his brothers, Dave and Ronnie and their wives, Lois and Garnetta. Bob's family takes great joy knowing that he is finally at peace and home with his loving wife, Joan who passed in 1994. They are holding hands and smiling down on us.
We have asked instead of flowers for donations to be sent to the following places:
“Remembering the Brave” This is an organization remembering and honoring families of fallen soldiers.
http://rememberingthebrave.org/
“Vitas Hospice” this group took wonderful care of us and Bob at the end of his life.
http://www.vitascharityfund.org/
I can’t thank all of you enough for your love and devotion you gave Bob and our family. I know that Bob has a clear mind and is now aware of all the things that we did for him, and all the love he was sent by friends and family far and near. I am so blessed and honored to have been the one to take care of him. Like I told one of the Hospice nurses, “I can’t say, Let’s do it again, but I certainly will say, I Would definitely do it again, without hesitation.”
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Extra, Extra --NY Times Headlines
So much has happened in the last six weeks that I feel like I’ve been on a trip around the world. I will try my best to get you all caught up.
After Sarah’s birthday, Bob went into full blown Parkinson’s dementia. We have always been dealing with behavior problems, no sleep, and some confusion, but this was ridiculous. It was like we were living in a nightmare and couldn’t wake up from it. Hospice was trying to work with us to get him under control. Medications were changed so much and fast I couldn’t keep up with what I was giving and when. I had to start looking at my medication chart that I keep for him every day. He also was beginning to look like he had been in a horrible accident. Bruises covered his arms and legs and it was hard to tell the new bruises from the old bruises.
Suddenly I found myself not taking photos of Bob for memories, but for documentation. I was taking photos of falls, injuries, and things he was doing at night to show Doctors and Nurses as they came to check on him. Grabbing the camera to take a photo wasn’t fun any more. It was beginning to be a chore and not pleasant.
I kept telling Bob over and over he had to be careful. “It’s only going to take one good fall.” I would tell him. Bob so wanted his independence though and would still get up and walk and do things when he wasn’t suppose to.
Well, that one good fall happened last week. Last Tuesday he got up and walked back to his bedroom and was looking through his dresser drawers. He turned, got his feet tangled, and fell. He had worn his angels out and this time they let him slip through their fingers and he hit the floor hard. He was taken to the hospital and we quickly learned that Bob had broken his hip.
On Wednesday, Bob had surgery and on Friday, he was sent home back to hospice. Bob did very well with the surgery, but he is not going to recover from this. He is being kept very comfortable and we are doing everything we can for him.
We have all had our emotional roller coaster ride. One minute we are laughing, and the next moment we start crying. Sarah is such a great kid and she told me the other day, “Mom, stop looking at Pop-Pop with your eyes and start looking at him with your heart and soul. If you will do that you will see that he is ready and you need to let his body go.” Wow, those were words of wisdom.
Last night Bob told me he needed a travel carry-on bag because he is getting ready to go on a trip in a couple of weeks. He kept telling me that he needed my help to pack. I told him, he was already packed and everything was already taken care of where he’s going.
He then told me that he wanted me to post his trip in the NY Times. I found that strange and asked if he didn’t mean the Lexington Harold, and he told me that was a good one also, but the NY Times was a bigger paper and more people would see it. He wanted it on the head lines. I told him I would take care of it.
As family and friends we are selfish and want Bob to stay with us forever and not complete his journey here on this earth, but if we stop looking with our eyes we will see that his journey is finish and it’s time for him to more on.
We are going to be blessed with hopefully, a few more weeks with him and we will cherish these last moments and use them to reflect back on memories of loved ones that he is about to be reunited with.
I will keep everyone informed the best that I can. If he is having a good day and can talk I will have him call people, we will just have to wait and see how things go. Please still send him your love because he can still feel it even if you are far way.
After Sarah’s birthday, Bob went into full blown Parkinson’s dementia. We have always been dealing with behavior problems, no sleep, and some confusion, but this was ridiculous. It was like we were living in a nightmare and couldn’t wake up from it. Hospice was trying to work with us to get him under control. Medications were changed so much and fast I couldn’t keep up with what I was giving and when. I had to start looking at my medication chart that I keep for him every day. He also was beginning to look like he had been in a horrible accident. Bruises covered his arms and legs and it was hard to tell the new bruises from the old bruises.
Suddenly I found myself not taking photos of Bob for memories, but for documentation. I was taking photos of falls, injuries, and things he was doing at night to show Doctors and Nurses as they came to check on him. Grabbing the camera to take a photo wasn’t fun any more. It was beginning to be a chore and not pleasant.
I kept telling Bob over and over he had to be careful. “It’s only going to take one good fall.” I would tell him. Bob so wanted his independence though and would still get up and walk and do things when he wasn’t suppose to.
Well, that one good fall happened last week. Last Tuesday he got up and walked back to his bedroom and was looking through his dresser drawers. He turned, got his feet tangled, and fell. He had worn his angels out and this time they let him slip through their fingers and he hit the floor hard. He was taken to the hospital and we quickly learned that Bob had broken his hip.
On Wednesday, Bob had surgery and on Friday, he was sent home back to hospice. Bob did very well with the surgery, but he is not going to recover from this. He is being kept very comfortable and we are doing everything we can for him.
We have all had our emotional roller coaster ride. One minute we are laughing, and the next moment we start crying. Sarah is such a great kid and she told me the other day, “Mom, stop looking at Pop-Pop with your eyes and start looking at him with your heart and soul. If you will do that you will see that he is ready and you need to let his body go.” Wow, those were words of wisdom.
Last night Bob told me he needed a travel carry-on bag because he is getting ready to go on a trip in a couple of weeks. He kept telling me that he needed my help to pack. I told him, he was already packed and everything was already taken care of where he’s going.
He then told me that he wanted me to post his trip in the NY Times. I found that strange and asked if he didn’t mean the Lexington Harold, and he told me that was a good one also, but the NY Times was a bigger paper and more people would see it. He wanted it on the head lines. I told him I would take care of it.
As family and friends we are selfish and want Bob to stay with us forever and not complete his journey here on this earth, but if we stop looking with our eyes we will see that his journey is finish and it’s time for him to more on.
We are going to be blessed with hopefully, a few more weeks with him and we will cherish these last moments and use them to reflect back on memories of loved ones that he is about to be reunited with.
I will keep everyone informed the best that I can. If he is having a good day and can talk I will have him call people, we will just have to wait and see how things go. Please still send him your love because he can still feel it even if you are far way.
Monday, August 16, 2010
Bob's progress
Well it’s been a couple of rough weeks, but we are still hanging in there. Sarah had her 16th birthday. We surprised her with a hot air balloon ride. It was a wonderful day. Pat came and sat with Bob while Tina, Rob, Sarah, and I went off for the morning. Great thanks and love goes out to Pat for allowing us to spend this special time with Sarah. She would have loved to have her Uncle and Grandfather with her, but Bob would not have been able to survive the day.
Bob had taken another turn for the worse. His behavior had gotten to be almost unbearable. He had gotten mean and aggressive. The doctor was forced to put him on an antipsychotic medication to control him. This has helped to a certain degree, but we are still having issues. He now requires 24 hour adult care. Sarah had been able to sit with him for an hour or so while Rob and I went to dinner once a week. That is no longer the case. He is doing things that she can’t take care of and needs an adult.
Hospice has been called in for us, but at this time he gets limited service from them. They come in once a week for about an hour. As time goes on they will give more and more help. Many people think that Hospice is only called in at the end of life and that isn’t true anymore. They can be with a family for three and four years sometimes. They get to know the family and help out more and more as the patient gets worse.
So what exactly is Bob doing? Well, I won’t go into all of it, because honestly, you just don’t want to know; but some of it is, trying to sit down in his chair when he is five feet from the chair. Then he falls on top of the chair and says we pushed him. He gets up at two AM and moves the toilet safety seat from the bathroom out in the hall. He refuses to eat dinner until we have to bribe, and threaten him with taking things away. If Rob is home he follows him everywhere and if Rob gets up to walk across the room he yells for him and tells him not to leave him. Yes, it has been a challenge.
While we try to sympathize with him, it gets hard because it is very frustrating. We are still working with the doctors to get some medication that will work for him. It will eventually get worked out. Tensions rise in the house, and we do explode every now and then. We go outside or retreat to our rooms until we are better and go back to deal with it again. And no, we don’t feel like saints, even though we have been told many times that is what we are. Many times we feel like devils because we have yelled, fussed, and fumed.
It’s not all bad though. There are times that we have good moments with him. He will say something funny, or Rob will sit and watch a movie with him. He will remember something from the past and tell us a story from when he was young. Those are good times and we relish in those moments. He was good for Pat on Sarah’s birthday, and we even went out as a whole family for dinner that evening.
Keep him in your thoughts. Foot ball season is fast approaching. I don’t know if he will be able to follow the games, we will just have to wait and see. He used to love watching sports, now they are confusing to him.
Bob had taken another turn for the worse. His behavior had gotten to be almost unbearable. He had gotten mean and aggressive. The doctor was forced to put him on an antipsychotic medication to control him. This has helped to a certain degree, but we are still having issues. He now requires 24 hour adult care. Sarah had been able to sit with him for an hour or so while Rob and I went to dinner once a week. That is no longer the case. He is doing things that she can’t take care of and needs an adult.
Hospice has been called in for us, but at this time he gets limited service from them. They come in once a week for about an hour. As time goes on they will give more and more help. Many people think that Hospice is only called in at the end of life and that isn’t true anymore. They can be with a family for three and four years sometimes. They get to know the family and help out more and more as the patient gets worse.
So what exactly is Bob doing? Well, I won’t go into all of it, because honestly, you just don’t want to know; but some of it is, trying to sit down in his chair when he is five feet from the chair. Then he falls on top of the chair and says we pushed him. He gets up at two AM and moves the toilet safety seat from the bathroom out in the hall. He refuses to eat dinner until we have to bribe, and threaten him with taking things away. If Rob is home he follows him everywhere and if Rob gets up to walk across the room he yells for him and tells him not to leave him. Yes, it has been a challenge.
While we try to sympathize with him, it gets hard because it is very frustrating. We are still working with the doctors to get some medication that will work for him. It will eventually get worked out. Tensions rise in the house, and we do explode every now and then. We go outside or retreat to our rooms until we are better and go back to deal with it again. And no, we don’t feel like saints, even though we have been told many times that is what we are. Many times we feel like devils because we have yelled, fussed, and fumed.
It’s not all bad though. There are times that we have good moments with him. He will say something funny, or Rob will sit and watch a movie with him. He will remember something from the past and tell us a story from when he was young. Those are good times and we relish in those moments. He was good for Pat on Sarah’s birthday, and we even went out as a whole family for dinner that evening.
Keep him in your thoughts. Foot ball season is fast approaching. I don’t know if he will be able to follow the games, we will just have to wait and see. He used to love watching sports, now they are confusing to him.
Sunday, August 1, 2010
He Caught a Fish!
Rob took Bob down to the lake this last week and told him he needed to fish some. Bob would cast and then stop and pull some weeds and then cast again. I went down and threw a few casts with him and didn’t catch anything.
I went back into the house to finish up dinner and Rob was out on the back porch grilling out some ribs. All of a sudden Bob started yelling for his brother, Dave. Rob went running towards the lake.
“Pop, what’s the matter?” asked Rob.
“I got one,” Bob replied.
Well, to be honest Rob didn’t really think his dad had a fish because he was all tangled up in the weeds. The only set of weeds on the beach since we had it cleaned off and of course Bob was pulling his line right smack dab in the middle of them.
Rob took the line and started to reel the line in honestly thinking there wasn’t anything on the end of it. Suddenly, there was a large splash and a big bass came jumping out of the weeds.
“Pop, you really do have a fish, do you want to reel him in, or do you want me to do it?” Rob asked.
“Pal, I don’t think I could get him in if I tried and I sure don’t want to loose him. Get him in for me,” Bob replied.
Well, Rob reeled him in through the weeds and then came and tapped on the window holding him up for me to see. I was so surprised. How cool was that? Bob talked about that bass all night long.
Bob goes to the doctor this week, regular and neurologist. Let’s hope for some good reports. He’s been having some slight problems the last couple of weeks with his memory and behavior. Hopefully, the doctors will be able to work together to get some things worked out.
Keep him in your thoughts this week.
I went back into the house to finish up dinner and Rob was out on the back porch grilling out some ribs. All of a sudden Bob started yelling for his brother, Dave. Rob went running towards the lake.
“Pop, what’s the matter?” asked Rob.
“I got one,” Bob replied.
Well, to be honest Rob didn’t really think his dad had a fish because he was all tangled up in the weeds. The only set of weeds on the beach since we had it cleaned off and of course Bob was pulling his line right smack dab in the middle of them.
Rob took the line and started to reel the line in honestly thinking there wasn’t anything on the end of it. Suddenly, there was a large splash and a big bass came jumping out of the weeds.
“Pop, you really do have a fish, do you want to reel him in, or do you want me to do it?” Rob asked.
“Pal, I don’t think I could get him in if I tried and I sure don’t want to loose him. Get him in for me,” Bob replied.
Well, Rob reeled him in through the weeds and then came and tapped on the window holding him up for me to see. I was so surprised. How cool was that? Bob talked about that bass all night long.
Bob goes to the doctor this week, regular and neurologist. Let’s hope for some good reports. He’s been having some slight problems the last couple of weeks with his memory and behavior. Hopefully, the doctors will be able to work together to get some things worked out.
Keep him in your thoughts this week.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
A Great Day!
Bob had a great birthday! Thanks everyone for sharing cards with him. He enjoyed opening cards all day long.
The family got together and we were blessed to have his grand daughter, Nancie visiting. Bob's great-grandson turns one next week so the young and old enjoyed cake and presents together.
Some things never change no matter how old you get.
The family got together and we were blessed to have his grand daughter, Nancie visiting. Bob's great-grandson turns one next week so the young and old enjoyed cake and presents together.
Some things never change no matter how old you get.
Monday, July 5, 2010
Happy July 4th
Well, it’s been awhile and it has been good and bad. We have had some busy months. It started off with a great visit from Charlie and Harold life long friends of Bob. In May, the three friends enjoyed a short visit by the lake talking about old times. Bob was in good spirits. He was put on an anti-depressant from his medical doctor and the first two weeks were great. He wanted to get outside and do things. He was in high spirits and we really had a good time with him.
After about two weeks, Bob started to return to his normal self, but it wasn’t as bad. We had a lot of work to do and we got him outside to help with the yard work, and painting of the house. Pat and Tina came over to help, and Bob worked hard when Pat was around.
Before we knew it, we had more company. Dave, Ronnie, and their families came to a week visit. Bob really enjoyed sitting with his brothers by the lake, fishing, and talking about old times. It was too short and fast of a week. They had to leave before we knew it, and we were all sad to see them go.
Bob was especially sad. He sat around for a week after they left feeling sorry and sad. Rob and I went to talk to the pharmacist about his anti-depressant medication. Well, low and behold the pharmacist had to pull him off of the medication due to other medications that Bob takes for Parkinson’s. The pharmacist is now researching a new anti-depressant medication that will work for Bob and trying to work with the doctors to get this problem fixed.
One thing that did boost his spirits was a visit from his grand-daughter, Christina. She arrived on July 4th for a week visit. We had a great 4th of July with food, fellowship, and a great fireworks display thanks to Pat and Tina. Since everyone was here and Christina won’t be here on the 17th for Bob’s birthday, we had a small cake and sang the traditional, “Chipley Birthday” song.
So other than being busy, and trying to keep him happy and not depressed, Bob is doing surprising well. On July 17, 2010 he will turn 80. We are very thankful he is still with us and we are still able to have some great memories with him. If you can, drop him a card with a photo for his birthday. He loves looking at memory books with all the photos of family and friends. And you know me; I have a ton of photos and memory books for him to look at.
After about two weeks, Bob started to return to his normal self, but it wasn’t as bad. We had a lot of work to do and we got him outside to help with the yard work, and painting of the house. Pat and Tina came over to help, and Bob worked hard when Pat was around.
Before we knew it, we had more company. Dave, Ronnie, and their families came to a week visit. Bob really enjoyed sitting with his brothers by the lake, fishing, and talking about old times. It was too short and fast of a week. They had to leave before we knew it, and we were all sad to see them go.
Bob was especially sad. He sat around for a week after they left feeling sorry and sad. Rob and I went to talk to the pharmacist about his anti-depressant medication. Well, low and behold the pharmacist had to pull him off of the medication due to other medications that Bob takes for Parkinson’s. The pharmacist is now researching a new anti-depressant medication that will work for Bob and trying to work with the doctors to get this problem fixed.
One thing that did boost his spirits was a visit from his grand-daughter, Christina. She arrived on July 4th for a week visit. We had a great 4th of July with food, fellowship, and a great fireworks display thanks to Pat and Tina. Since everyone was here and Christina won’t be here on the 17th for Bob’s birthday, we had a small cake and sang the traditional, “Chipley Birthday” song.
So other than being busy, and trying to keep him happy and not depressed, Bob is doing surprising well. On July 17, 2010 he will turn 80. We are very thankful he is still with us and we are still able to have some great memories with him. If you can, drop him a card with a photo for his birthday. He loves looking at memory books with all the photos of family and friends. And you know me; I have a ton of photos and memory books for him to look at.
Friday, April 23, 2010
Remember, he's special!
We had a quiet Easter with Bob. He doesn’t do much anymore. Getting him to get up out of bed seems to be a struggle these days. There was one day that he decided to stay in bed the entire day, until Rob came home. Rob and Pat are the only ones that can motivate him now. It seems that Rob comes home at least three days a week now and sits to have a heart to heart with his dad.
His mental health is failing more and more. When he returns to the doctor in a few weeks we are going to ask for a PET scan on him. I don’t think it will give us information to help improve his quality of life, but rather it will give us the information we need to understand what he is going through.
He likes to get up in the middle of the night and wake the house up. It will be two AM and he will start calling for everyone asking, “What’s going on? What are we going to do today?” One night I sat in the hall reading my book telling him to go back to his room every twenty minutes. He was in a state of sleep walk and we were told that this is a symptom of Parkinson’s. There isn’t a medication that will stop this and he has no memory of it the next day. He tore down his curtains and rods in his room, so we put brown craft paper over his windows. I left about 12” at the top of the window to allow light in. At first we just left the windows bare, but that was really bad, since he could still see out the window. Covering the windows up stopped a lot of the confusion at night seeing lights and shadows out the window. If he pulls the paper off, it is a whole lot cheaper to replace than curtain rods that are bent in half.
Rob takes Bob outside after he gets home from work to walk around the house and the back yard. They walk around the house twice and then Bob has to sit and rest for awhile. Rob can get his dad to walk about six times around the house before he is exhausted and done. Then we sit on the back porch for awhile. The weather has been nice lately and sitting outside seeing the birds, squirrels, and ducks have been a real treat.
He misses Kentucky and his friends and relatives that he can’t see anymore. He talks of his grandchildren and asks how they are. If you think about it, try and drop him a card with a picture. He doesn’t read anymore, it’s not that he can’t see; he can’t comprehend what he has read. He will pick up an advertisement from off the table and carry it around with him for hours, looking at it, and trying to figure it out. After a few hours, I will ask him if he is done with it and after he hands it back, I will read it, or ask if he’s hungry for pizza since it was a coupon for pizza. Then he will understand what the paper was and respond. Pictures he likes. He sat one day for almost the entire day looking at old photo albums.
We got him a new chair! He kept lying down on the couch and I told Rob I was tired of fighting with him to sit up. We went and bought him a recliner. He can’t figure out how to push back with his back and lie back, so he sits up half the day and then Rob or I will walk over and push on the back and he can lean back half of the day. I honestly think he would prefer the couch, but we told him that we bought the chair special just for him.
We thought about a lift chair, but I am against it at this time. It would work with him, but Bob is the type that if you give him on inch of help, he will go for the mile. He will get to the point that he will refuse to get up without help, and he can get up. He will also play with the buttons which will be a nightmare. I know we will wind up covering up the buttons to keep him off of them. Then he will refuse to get up unless WE pushed the button. No, bad, bad, bad idea.
Remember the special one this week. He remembers all of you, it may not be all the time, but he does still remember.
His mental health is failing more and more. When he returns to the doctor in a few weeks we are going to ask for a PET scan on him. I don’t think it will give us information to help improve his quality of life, but rather it will give us the information we need to understand what he is going through.
He likes to get up in the middle of the night and wake the house up. It will be two AM and he will start calling for everyone asking, “What’s going on? What are we going to do today?” One night I sat in the hall reading my book telling him to go back to his room every twenty minutes. He was in a state of sleep walk and we were told that this is a symptom of Parkinson’s. There isn’t a medication that will stop this and he has no memory of it the next day. He tore down his curtains and rods in his room, so we put brown craft paper over his windows. I left about 12” at the top of the window to allow light in. At first we just left the windows bare, but that was really bad, since he could still see out the window. Covering the windows up stopped a lot of the confusion at night seeing lights and shadows out the window. If he pulls the paper off, it is a whole lot cheaper to replace than curtain rods that are bent in half.
Rob takes Bob outside after he gets home from work to walk around the house and the back yard. They walk around the house twice and then Bob has to sit and rest for awhile. Rob can get his dad to walk about six times around the house before he is exhausted and done. Then we sit on the back porch for awhile. The weather has been nice lately and sitting outside seeing the birds, squirrels, and ducks have been a real treat.
He misses Kentucky and his friends and relatives that he can’t see anymore. He talks of his grandchildren and asks how they are. If you think about it, try and drop him a card with a picture. He doesn’t read anymore, it’s not that he can’t see; he can’t comprehend what he has read. He will pick up an advertisement from off the table and carry it around with him for hours, looking at it, and trying to figure it out. After a few hours, I will ask him if he is done with it and after he hands it back, I will read it, or ask if he’s hungry for pizza since it was a coupon for pizza. Then he will understand what the paper was and respond. Pictures he likes. He sat one day for almost the entire day looking at old photo albums.
We got him a new chair! He kept lying down on the couch and I told Rob I was tired of fighting with him to sit up. We went and bought him a recliner. He can’t figure out how to push back with his back and lie back, so he sits up half the day and then Rob or I will walk over and push on the back and he can lean back half of the day. I honestly think he would prefer the couch, but we told him that we bought the chair special just for him.
We thought about a lift chair, but I am against it at this time. It would work with him, but Bob is the type that if you give him on inch of help, he will go for the mile. He will get to the point that he will refuse to get up without help, and he can get up. He will also play with the buttons which will be a nightmare. I know we will wind up covering up the buttons to keep him off of them. Then he will refuse to get up unless WE pushed the button. No, bad, bad, bad idea.
Remember the special one this week. He remembers all of you, it may not be all the time, but he does still remember.
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Monday, March 29, 2010
Back to his old self
We had a great six days of bliss with Bob. He is now his old self again. Fighting to go outside, and arguing about everything, but he isn’t winning. That’s alright though; I will take the six days and look forward to the next six days in the future.
He hates going out and working in the yard. It’s a lot of work for him to do this. He says he wants to use the exercise bike instead. The bike is good, but we have told him it isn’t getting him fresh air and sunshine. It also isn’t getting him up and walking. While he does sit outside while he pulls weeds, he is still up and walking around a lot.
Last week, one night, he got up at midnight and decided to go through all of his drawers in his dresser. Thank God, I had already cleaned out a lot of these drawers and there wasn’t a whole lot left. I went back to his room and found him with things all over his bed. When I asked him what he was doing, he told me that he was trying to figure out what all of the stuff was. Sarah and I had to take everything out of his room that night and pile it up on the dining room table. I had to go through the rest of the stuff the next day and finish cleaning out his room. At least I got his room clean and that room is now done for the spring cleaning.
Saturday, everyone worked in the yard all day. After we were done, and resting, Rob announced that everyone needed to go inside and get cleaned up. Bob pitched a fit for getting another bath. He had just gotten one the day before, and he didn’t understand why he needed another one. We all laughed and told him he was filthy from digging in the dirt. He told us a little dirt never hurt anyone, but I told him that it would hurt the couch and he wasn’t going in and sitting on it with dirt all over him. Rob told him he would live through another bath and to get inside and get it over with. I am happy to report that he did indeed live and smelled so much better. We were all very tired Saturday evening after working so hard in the yard.
The weather here has been nice. Warm during the day and cool in the evenings. We have had some rain, but nothing horrible. All of the plants are starting to bud and when the summer finally does hit, they should be in full bloom.
Keep Bob in your thoughts this Easter and encourage him to get out and enjoy life. This is the time of year that it is perfect for getting outside and getting some fresh air. We all need to air our bones out from being cooped up all winter.
He hates going out and working in the yard. It’s a lot of work for him to do this. He says he wants to use the exercise bike instead. The bike is good, but we have told him it isn’t getting him fresh air and sunshine. It also isn’t getting him up and walking. While he does sit outside while he pulls weeds, he is still up and walking around a lot.
Last week, one night, he got up at midnight and decided to go through all of his drawers in his dresser. Thank God, I had already cleaned out a lot of these drawers and there wasn’t a whole lot left. I went back to his room and found him with things all over his bed. When I asked him what he was doing, he told me that he was trying to figure out what all of the stuff was. Sarah and I had to take everything out of his room that night and pile it up on the dining room table. I had to go through the rest of the stuff the next day and finish cleaning out his room. At least I got his room clean and that room is now done for the spring cleaning.
Saturday, everyone worked in the yard all day. After we were done, and resting, Rob announced that everyone needed to go inside and get cleaned up. Bob pitched a fit for getting another bath. He had just gotten one the day before, and he didn’t understand why he needed another one. We all laughed and told him he was filthy from digging in the dirt. He told us a little dirt never hurt anyone, but I told him that it would hurt the couch and he wasn’t going in and sitting on it with dirt all over him. Rob told him he would live through another bath and to get inside and get it over with. I am happy to report that he did indeed live and smelled so much better. We were all very tired Saturday evening after working so hard in the yard.
The weather here has been nice. Warm during the day and cool in the evenings. We have had some rain, but nothing horrible. All of the plants are starting to bud and when the summer finally does hit, they should be in full bloom.
Keep Bob in your thoughts this Easter and encourage him to get out and enjoy life. This is the time of year that it is perfect for getting outside and getting some fresh air. We all need to air our bones out from being cooped up all winter.
Saturday, March 20, 2010
Life is good again
Happy St. Patrick’s Day! What a wild week this has been. Monday, was a terrible day. I honestly think it was one of the worst days I have ever spent with Bob. The weather has been nice for a few days, and so I took Bob outside to sit in the sun while Sarah and I raked leaves. We knew Bob wasn’t able to rake, but he could sit in the sun and get some fresh air.
I handed Bob a rake and tried to get him to rake around his chair. That was a disaster. He pitched a horrible fit and refused to do anything. So next I moved is chair next to a large pile of leaves so that he could help pick the leaves up and put them in the bag. Once again, he refused to do anything. Then he refused to walk for me or even stand.
It was a horrible day with tons of nasty comments until finally I blew and let him have it. I told him he was working his way towards a nursing home and I threw in a few other comments along the way also.
Rob came home from work to find a house that was totally out of control. I was on the verge of tears from anger and frustration. Sarah was afraid to move or speak, and Bob was still throwing a fit and pouting on the couch. Rob came in the house, went over to his father and sat down.
“Pop, are you giving up? Is that really what you are doing?” He asked.
“Yep,” Bob replied.
Sarah and I just stared at each other amazed that Bob was actually telling the truth. We stealthily slipped away to another room to get away from anything that might begin after that comment.
I have to tell you, that I adore my husband, because in a situation like that where most people would loose their mind and begin to yell, he is calm, but stern. He began to tell his father that he was breaking his and Tina’s heart because of his actions. He continued to talk for about 45 minutes to him, telling him to listen and not speak. After he was done with his lecture, he told him to sit and think about what he had said to him, and then he walked away.
Tuesday came and I again took Bob outside while Sarah and I raked leaves. This time while Sarah and I raked I handed Bob a broom and told him to sweep the back porch off. He stood up, and started to sweep. He continued to sweep as Sarah and I worked and we continued to praise his work. He did a fabulous job.
After we had finished working and Bob and I where sitting on the back porch, Bob told me he was sorry. He told me he had thought all night long and he had been a stubborn mule. I surely didn’t disagree with that one. I told him I was sorry for the things I had said to him in anger. We had a good talk about his actions and how he needed to do things in order to feel better about himself and for his health.
Wednesday, Pat and Tina stopped by right after Bob had gotten up. He came out and greeted them and then asked for his shoes. I went and got them and then he proceeded to pull everyone outside with him to get going on working for the day. Tina and I just laughed and were amazed at the change in him. Pat took him out and helped him rake, sweep and then pull weeds. He didn’t even want to go in after 2:00 when I told him I was tired and was done.
Thursday, Rob stayed home from work and it was a little chilly. I didn’t get him outside till after 3:00, but he swept again, while I picked up leaves. We sat on the back porch with Rob and laughed and talked. It was wonderful.
Friday, he worked again in the yard and then asked to go fishing. I got him a pole and took him to the lake. He sat and fished for over an hour. He almost got a bite, but it got away.
I can’t tell you if this will last, but please say a prayer that it does for a very long time. He is a joy to be around when he is like this. He is doing so much better, mentally and physically. And as for watching TV; in the last three days he has only watched a few shows during the day. YEAH!!!!!!!!
I handed Bob a rake and tried to get him to rake around his chair. That was a disaster. He pitched a horrible fit and refused to do anything. So next I moved is chair next to a large pile of leaves so that he could help pick the leaves up and put them in the bag. Once again, he refused to do anything. Then he refused to walk for me or even stand.
It was a horrible day with tons of nasty comments until finally I blew and let him have it. I told him he was working his way towards a nursing home and I threw in a few other comments along the way also.
Rob came home from work to find a house that was totally out of control. I was on the verge of tears from anger and frustration. Sarah was afraid to move or speak, and Bob was still throwing a fit and pouting on the couch. Rob came in the house, went over to his father and sat down.
“Pop, are you giving up? Is that really what you are doing?” He asked.
“Yep,” Bob replied.
Sarah and I just stared at each other amazed that Bob was actually telling the truth. We stealthily slipped away to another room to get away from anything that might begin after that comment.
I have to tell you, that I adore my husband, because in a situation like that where most people would loose their mind and begin to yell, he is calm, but stern. He began to tell his father that he was breaking his and Tina’s heart because of his actions. He continued to talk for about 45 minutes to him, telling him to listen and not speak. After he was done with his lecture, he told him to sit and think about what he had said to him, and then he walked away.
Tuesday came and I again took Bob outside while Sarah and I raked leaves. This time while Sarah and I raked I handed Bob a broom and told him to sweep the back porch off. He stood up, and started to sweep. He continued to sweep as Sarah and I worked and we continued to praise his work. He did a fabulous job.
After we had finished working and Bob and I where sitting on the back porch, Bob told me he was sorry. He told me he had thought all night long and he had been a stubborn mule. I surely didn’t disagree with that one. I told him I was sorry for the things I had said to him in anger. We had a good talk about his actions and how he needed to do things in order to feel better about himself and for his health.
Wednesday, Pat and Tina stopped by right after Bob had gotten up. He came out and greeted them and then asked for his shoes. I went and got them and then he proceeded to pull everyone outside with him to get going on working for the day. Tina and I just laughed and were amazed at the change in him. Pat took him out and helped him rake, sweep and then pull weeds. He didn’t even want to go in after 2:00 when I told him I was tired and was done.
Thursday, Rob stayed home from work and it was a little chilly. I didn’t get him outside till after 3:00, but he swept again, while I picked up leaves. We sat on the back porch with Rob and laughed and talked. It was wonderful.
Friday, he worked again in the yard and then asked to go fishing. I got him a pole and took him to the lake. He sat and fished for over an hour. He almost got a bite, but it got away.
I can’t tell you if this will last, but please say a prayer that it does for a very long time. He is a joy to be around when he is like this. He is doing so much better, mentally and physically. And as for watching TV; in the last three days he has only watched a few shows during the day. YEAH!!!!!!!!
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Update!
Well, it’s been awhile. Things are still the same. Time seems to run together now except for a few good days that stands out. A typical day for Bob is getting up around 10:00 and sitting on the couch until 6:00 where he then moves to the table to eat dinner. After dinner he moves back to the couch to watch a ball game until bedtime between 9 and 10. A few days out of the week Rob gets him on the bike to peddle while watching a show.
I spend the day switching out DVD’s for Bob to watch and giving him his medication on time. Oh sure, we have tried to get him to do other things; coloring, drawing, word puzzles, typing, writing with a pen or pencil. They all end up the same way, first he can’t do it, then he needs something different, like it’s not the right kind of pencil, or the right kind of pen. He couldn’t type on the computer; he needed an old fashioned kind of type writer. It’s always the same thing. We drag it all out, and then put it all back away with nothing being accomplished but a lot of arguments. He talks a good talk about wanting to do these things, but when we call his bluff and pull everything out, he suddenly can’t do it and it isn’t the right things he needs.
I sat one day with him for about 45 minutes trying to get him to type. He told me he couldn’t see the print. I made the print larger. He told me he couldn’t see the keys, I went and got a lamp. He told me he still couldn’t see the keys, I told him to point to the letters with one finger. He got every letter right. I then gave him a simple sentence to type. He got a few words out, but then stopped and said he couldn’t do it. At least he did try.
It isn’t all doom and gloom. The doctor’s say he is doing very well. He has the best blood work of anyone in the house. He has lost some weight, but we are working on getting some back on him. He doesn’t eat much anymore and we are constantly shoving food in his mouth. He is very healthy physically. Mentally, well what can I say?
We have had some good days though. Pat and Tina took Bob for a day while Rob, Sarah, and I went to the flea market. It was a wonderful day on both sides. Rob and I had a great day with Sarah and even went to dinner and a movie after the flea market. Pat and Tina took Bob to Dunkin Donuts, back to their house and then out to dinner at an Italian restaurant. After dinner they went back to their house, lit a fire in the fire place, and watched an old movie. Bob had a fabulous day mentally and physically. Pat and Tina were really pleased they were blessed with such a good day.
About two weeks latter, Pat, Tina, Sarah and I took Bob bowling. That was another fabulous day. We bowled three games and Bob threw two frames a game. He got a strike and picked up a spare. He was very pleased with himself. He uses a kid’s ball, but still has the throw down. We all laughed and had a great time hanging out with him.
A few days ago, I took Bob and Sarah to Denny’s for dinner. He was very happy about that. He had biscuits and gravy. It took him an hour to eat, but he ate every drop on the plate. Sarah and I finished our meal and then sat and talked letting him finish at his own pace. He enjoyed getting out.
The weather is finally warming up down here in Florida. We are very happy for that. I don’t mind the cold, but this year was just ridiculous they way it lingered on and was just freezing. Burrrr. Poor Bob about turned into a Popsicle. With the cold weather leaving and the warm weather moving in, Bob will be able to go outside more and get some fresh air. Hopefully, I will be able to get him out by the lake and sit a spell. If I can’t get him out I know Rob and Pat can.
Keep the one, who thinks he’s old, but has no clue as to how young he really is, in your thoughts this week. He does love hearing from everyone. His phone conversations only last about ten minutes before he starts saying good-bye. Ten minutes is better than nothing though.
I spend the day switching out DVD’s for Bob to watch and giving him his medication on time. Oh sure, we have tried to get him to do other things; coloring, drawing, word puzzles, typing, writing with a pen or pencil. They all end up the same way, first he can’t do it, then he needs something different, like it’s not the right kind of pencil, or the right kind of pen. He couldn’t type on the computer; he needed an old fashioned kind of type writer. It’s always the same thing. We drag it all out, and then put it all back away with nothing being accomplished but a lot of arguments. He talks a good talk about wanting to do these things, but when we call his bluff and pull everything out, he suddenly can’t do it and it isn’t the right things he needs.
I sat one day with him for about 45 minutes trying to get him to type. He told me he couldn’t see the print. I made the print larger. He told me he couldn’t see the keys, I went and got a lamp. He told me he still couldn’t see the keys, I told him to point to the letters with one finger. He got every letter right. I then gave him a simple sentence to type. He got a few words out, but then stopped and said he couldn’t do it. At least he did try.
It isn’t all doom and gloom. The doctor’s say he is doing very well. He has the best blood work of anyone in the house. He has lost some weight, but we are working on getting some back on him. He doesn’t eat much anymore and we are constantly shoving food in his mouth. He is very healthy physically. Mentally, well what can I say?
We have had some good days though. Pat and Tina took Bob for a day while Rob, Sarah, and I went to the flea market. It was a wonderful day on both sides. Rob and I had a great day with Sarah and even went to dinner and a movie after the flea market. Pat and Tina took Bob to Dunkin Donuts, back to their house and then out to dinner at an Italian restaurant. After dinner they went back to their house, lit a fire in the fire place, and watched an old movie. Bob had a fabulous day mentally and physically. Pat and Tina were really pleased they were blessed with such a good day.
About two weeks latter, Pat, Tina, Sarah and I took Bob bowling. That was another fabulous day. We bowled three games and Bob threw two frames a game. He got a strike and picked up a spare. He was very pleased with himself. He uses a kid’s ball, but still has the throw down. We all laughed and had a great time hanging out with him.
A few days ago, I took Bob and Sarah to Denny’s for dinner. He was very happy about that. He had biscuits and gravy. It took him an hour to eat, but he ate every drop on the plate. Sarah and I finished our meal and then sat and talked letting him finish at his own pace. He enjoyed getting out.
The weather is finally warming up down here in Florida. We are very happy for that. I don’t mind the cold, but this year was just ridiculous they way it lingered on and was just freezing. Burrrr. Poor Bob about turned into a Popsicle. With the cold weather leaving and the warm weather moving in, Bob will be able to go outside more and get some fresh air. Hopefully, I will be able to get him out by the lake and sit a spell. If I can’t get him out I know Rob and Pat can.
Keep the one, who thinks he’s old, but has no clue as to how young he really is, in your thoughts this week. He does love hearing from everyone. His phone conversations only last about ten minutes before he starts saying good-bye. Ten minutes is better than nothing though.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Happy New Year!
We made it through the holidays! Bob has had a rough two weeks, but it is finally winding down. Christmas was almost too much for him and next year we are toning things down even more with him. Smaller amounts of presents and we will let him open presents separate from the family. He got upset while we were opening presents as a group this year. It was just too much going on at one time for him.
New Years was better. We put him to bed early and he brought in the New Year snoring. We tried to do some family activities with him, but each time he got himself worked up and we wound up cancelling events to keep him calm.
We have had issues with him refusing to eat and drink again. His Parkinson’s medication is taken five times a day and it is hard on his system when he doesn’t eat anything. I was raking my brain trying to come up with ideas of how to make him eat and drink. Finally, after calling my Mother and talking it through we came up with a plan. He takes his medication five times a day. Each time he takes his pills he gets ¼ of a sandwich and a small sweet. That way he is eating and it isn’t a full meal. So he grazes all day. He still gets dinner with the family at six. We are hoping that this plan will work out for him.
Bob enjoyed all of his cards he got during the holidays. Pictures of family, small notes from friends really made him feel loved.
We hope that everyone had a great holiday and is now refreshed to return to work, and the regular routine of everyday life. Happy New Year everyone and let’s look forward to what 2010 has in store for us all.
New Years was better. We put him to bed early and he brought in the New Year snoring. We tried to do some family activities with him, but each time he got himself worked up and we wound up cancelling events to keep him calm.
We have had issues with him refusing to eat and drink again. His Parkinson’s medication is taken five times a day and it is hard on his system when he doesn’t eat anything. I was raking my brain trying to come up with ideas of how to make him eat and drink. Finally, after calling my Mother and talking it through we came up with a plan. He takes his medication five times a day. Each time he takes his pills he gets ¼ of a sandwich and a small sweet. That way he is eating and it isn’t a full meal. So he grazes all day. He still gets dinner with the family at six. We are hoping that this plan will work out for him.
Bob enjoyed all of his cards he got during the holidays. Pictures of family, small notes from friends really made him feel loved.
We hope that everyone had a great holiday and is now refreshed to return to work, and the regular routine of everyday life. Happy New Year everyone and let’s look forward to what 2010 has in store for us all.
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